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That's horrible! Did they arrest him? I'm not surprised that you're having an anxiety attack. That's perfectly normal under the circumstances. It must have been so scary to wake up with someone in the house, especially when you have a small child. He's not just despised by you...and I don't even know him!

Thanks everyone for understanding! Anxiety varies for me from day to day, but these parcels have been a real challenge. I'm also one who hates to use the phone, i'd much rather have face to face contact, even though thats hard too. It goes from walking around town carefree and wishing people a good day, to shaking curled up in the corner
Thats sucks BMH! Have you changed the locks yet? Or at least put an extra bolt or chain on the door or something. I think you were well justified in defending your home. Heck I'm proud of you for standing up to him! You're much braver then me!!

yessamaca wrote:That's horrible! Did they arrest him? I'm not surprised that you're having an anxiety attack. That's perfectly normal under the circumstances. It must have been so scary to wake up with someone in the house, especially when you have a small child. He's not just despised by you...and I don't even know him!

I don't think they did, to be honest I'm more likely to be arrested if I've done any damage to his face (and that's entirely possible) but I'm not worried about that. And it wasn't even after bedtime, my daughter was still up and about and she witnessed the whole thing. Needless to say she and my sister were very upset by the whole matter. But I felt I was protecting them from an intruder, even if he is related to us.

QueenBex wrote:Have you changed the locks yet? Or at least put an extra bolt or chain on the door or something.

I have the doors locked with the keys in the locks so a key can't be used from the outside. And I've got all the deadlocks and things fastened as well. I've asked the local authority if they will change the locks, of course. I'm still very much on edge in case he decides to show his face around here, although I don't think he will.

QueenBex wrote:I think you were well justified in defending your home. Heck I'm proud of you for standing up to him! You're much braver then me!!

Thank you. I'm kinda proud of myself, too. Although I did my best to stay calm for as long as I possibly could, I doubt there's anyone among us who would remain so with a 5'10" man shouting and swearing obscenities half an inch away from their face! I admit maybe I went a little too far, but I also think I had little choice.

Not to worry, everyone! Hopefully this will go out as a message that I won't be pushed around anymore - I've had enough!

You guys make all my "problems" seem pretty silly in comparison... but maybe this will make you laugh a little at least. I also hope everyone is taking care of themselves - mentally and physically! It takes a lot of strength and courage to do it, no matter the situation.

Anyhow, I "teach" a hybrid-online course (i.e. we have some on campus days but most of it is online). It's a required course for all undergraduates so no one likes the course but it's also not hard. Students basically only fail for 2 reasons: either they wait until the last minute to do the work (online quizzes) or they don't take the class seriously.
I had 6 emails from students this morning (about 10% of one of my classes). The excuses range from "I forgot" to "I was at a ceremony for my frat" to gawd knows what else and sometimes it takes all of my self control to not write back: you're supposed to be an adult now and that means making adult decisions and living with the consequences.

This is more of a frustration than a FML situation. But it feels good to write it down somewhere.

BMH, I'm sorry he's still around and making your life miserable! I'm keeping my fingers crossed that he makes himself extremely scarce and that you and your family stay safe!!

kuja, fail them all! Give me a break! There are no excuses and the ones they gave are weaksauce!

Also, yeah, I'm totally on board with the phone thing. I make my husband do most of it and he hates it too!! It does make life a little difficult at times.

Ooh kuja, I dunno if I could do like you and resist sending a snarky reply! You should give out a failprize for worst excuse of the week, or something.

kuja.girl wrote:I also hope everyone is taking care of themselves - mentally and physically! It takes a lot of strength and courage to do it, no matter the situation.

True that. Everyone give yourself a pat on the back, ok? BMH SAYS SO

blackmageheart wrote:Ooh kuja, I dunno if I could do like you and resist sending a snarky reply! You should give out a failprize for worst excuse of the week, or something.

Best idea ever!

Yurtle wrote:

blackmageheart wrote:Ooh kuja, I dunno if I could do like you and resist sending a snarky reply! You should give out a failprize for worst excuse of the week, or something. :D

Best idea ever!

Well the worst email I've had so far was from someone who was panicking late at night (it was mean/accusatory and ridiculous). Once I met with them they apologized for it and explained they had been under a lot of stress from other classes. I told them "Yeah, I kind of figured something else was going on."
But my coworker got the strangest/funniest one I've seen yet on Monday:
Subject Line: F*** you.
Content: Yup. F*** you.
She emailed them asking what was going on and they said it was not meant for her but damn lol.

And... the main reason I can't automatically be snarky is because sometimes they have legit reasons. I've seen family deaths, sickness/injuries, etc. I also don't want them to think I don't care - I do, I just hate BS and have a low threshold for people who value partying over learning ;)

Also my empathy/sympathy for everyone with anxiety as I also have anxiety. I have been able to keep it manageable with medications, some therapy, and carefully managing my responsibilities (I know I don't handle stress/pressure well). I'm pretty good on the phone now (I used to hate it) but I still get the jitters when I teach/present. I have started to view these as challenges and chances to improve but it has taken me a long time to reach this level there are days when I still want to just call it quits.

blackmageheart wrote:True that. Everyone give yourself a pat on the back, ok? BMH SAYS SO

So BMH commands, so shall it be. *pats self on back*

blackmageheart wrote:And it wasn't even after bedtime, my daughter was still up and about and she witnessed the whole thing. Needless to say she and my sister were very upset by the whole matter. But I felt I was protecting them from an intruder, even if he is related to us.

How scary for her and all of you! I hope everything works out for you and that you don't have any more problems with him!

kuja.girl wrote:I also don't want them to think I don't care - I do, I just hate BS and have a low threshold for people who value partying over learning

My brother is having similar issues with his students, haha. He teaches a class about writing in the workplace (I forget the technical name), and he assigned them to write out instructions for a task - any task as long as it was explained well enough to be understood by someone else. One student plans to write about "the proper way to shotgun a beer." I asked him if the assignment was done well, if he would count is as a win as a teacher or a fail for humanity. lol
Also, that email....