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Re: Venting Thread, or FML!

Posted: Thu Nov 14, 2013 1:46 am
by no_need
For LinkIsMyHomeboy:
Spoiler
I can't pretend I know what you're going through personally, but when I was younger I dated a guy who suffered from quite severe depression. He was a self-harmer as well, and a lot of the things you shared (which was very brave of you, I might add) sound so much like the things he went through... I have to tell you, he thought that everything was hopeless. He was ready to give it all up, and I was constantly terrified that one day he just wouldn't be there any more. Once he went on a long weekend away with his family and I forgot he was going, so when I didn't get a reply to my text (since his phone was off as he was abroad) I went absolutely frantic with worry until he got in touch.

Now, my point is this... After about 18 months of the above, my ex finally started getting therapy. He got loads better over a few months, but then had to move away with his family and didn't find another therapist. He found exactly the same problem as you - medication is important, but therapy also has a significant impact. We split up, not due to his health problems but because our long distance relationship wasn't working, but kept in touch enough for me to know that now (about 6 years on) he is doing so much better after having found another therapist. I sincerely hope that you don't have any more upsets which interrupt your therapy, as I'm sure you'll find that it is more and more effective the longer you go, and eventually (hopefully) you won't need it anymore.

In the meantime, remember - everyone is worth more alive, because then you always have the chance to make things better, even if sometimes it's difficult to see how.
:hug:

Re: Venting Thread, or FML!

Posted: Thu Nov 14, 2013 2:21 am
by Ally
Not quite the same. Hell, barely even comparable, but even so... I'm prone to bouts of... let's call it lowness, and some pretty broody, introspective, contemplative moments where I ponder things that perhaps I shouldn't for reasons that, even to me, sound whiny, bratty and petulant but still manage to make me feel like an utter failure at life thus far. The one thing that makes me feel better is the belief that things cannot possibly be this crappy forever. Once you hit the bottom you can only go up, and I dearly hope for your sake LinkIsMyHomeboy, that things look up for you soon. We aren't therapists, but I'm sure everyone here is happy to hear you vent and offer what they can :)

I don't know about the experience you guys may have had with vets, but tell me if you've ever had something like this happen to you. We thought our dog, Beanie, was quite ill. He'd stopped eating his food and generally looked very, very pitiful. We took him to the vet where the woman felt Beanie up, shaved his neck, drew blood, took a urine sample, and asked us many odd questions about his daily habits only to be told she suspected thyroid cancer, and that it was quite common in beagles and that she'd treated many dogs that year with the cancer (as though it's a catching disease!). Naturally, mum and I freaked out. Not having much money we had no idea how we'd pay for Beanie's treatment, not to mention the initial vet bill. Anyway, we got the blood and biopsy results back today only to be told that Beanie was fine, perfectly healthy in fact, and that perhaps we should try a different brand of dog food. Can you sue a vet for emotional distress? I've spent the past 24 hours wondering what I have of value to sell, and borderline heartbroken that my dog might be dying! I should have known though; the same vet thought Beanie had cancer last year when we took him in for some issues with his *ahem* anal glands. Melodramatic b*tch! If anyone wants to see sad Beanie see below...
Spoiler
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DSC00983.JPG (57.56 KiB) Viewed 1776 times

Re: Venting Thread, or FML!

Posted: Fri Nov 15, 2013 6:44 am
by blackmageheart
LIMH - You're very brave to admit to all that stuff. It took me a very long time to tell anyone about my voices, but I think its an important step. I've struggled with mental health problems for most of my life, so I know the road is long and hard. I've even considered my own end, and still do sometimes. I guess what I'm saying is, no matter what your personal problems, you're not alone!
I hope you can get some sort of therapy and meds, because they do help!

Re: Venting Thread, or FML!

Posted: Fri Nov 15, 2013 8:26 am
by rockinwithrammstein
LinkIsMyHomeboy, I know we've not had any extended conversations on here, and I am sure you've only seen my screen name pop up on here only a couple times, but my inbox is ALWAYS open and I am pretty much always online. That goes for anyone, if ANYONE needs someone to unload on, I would be happy to let you vent :wave:

Re: Venting Thread, or FML!

Posted: Fri Nov 15, 2013 7:07 pm
by LinkIsMyHomeboy
Thank you all for your kind words and for reaching out to me. I'm not happy to hear that there are other people with the same/similar issues, but it is nice to not be alone. I really appreciate it.

Re: Venting Thread, or FML!

Posted: Sat Nov 16, 2013 12:40 pm
by kuja.girl
@LinkIsMyHomeboy - mental issues suck. My family has anxiety issues (for at least 3 generations on one side) and I've been on meds for over 10 years. I've had therapy off and on over the years because mine isn't as bad as it could be and I've learned to recognize when it's changing or influencing my behavior. This August when I lost both my new pet (story below) and my grandfather I got pretty low. While I was able to get past it, I am still planning on seeing a therapist because I'm still not 100%. So hang in there, You're doing the right thing telling those you love and seeking help. It can be a long road but it's better when it's not taken alone.
Ally wrote:Can you sue a vet for emotional distress? I've spent the past 24 hours wondering what I have of value to sell, and borderline heartbroken that my dog might be dying! I should have known though; the same vet thought Beanie had cancer last year when we took him in for some issues with his *ahem* anal glands. Melodramatic b*tch!
@Ally- It sounds like your vet did the right thing by 1)telling you what she suspected, 2) running tests, 3) giving you the results ... it may be that her bedside manner just sucks. There are good vets, bad vets and just "ok" vets. Instead of suing I would just consider changing vets. Lawsuits will reopen the wounds that have started to heal and will be even more emotional trauma. I have found that it's better to just move on... (my recent personal experience below in the spoiler).
Spoiler
I learned the hard way - never bring an exotic animal to a normal vet when you have a university vet hospital available with an exotic animal specialist. :/
I got a pet for the first time in years this summer, a really sweet little bird, only to lose him 4 weeks later right after his first vet visit. The coincidence seemed too much, but the University vet hospital (where he got more care) knew what they were doing and tried their best. It sucked. I had just opened my heart to this little guy and started training him when he was torn away from me. I was about to seek council with a lawyer over the whole thing but first I talked to the University vet - she told me there was no known correlation between the meds the 1st vet gave me and what killed my bird. The medications "may" have triggered his condition, but frankly if he had the disease they suspected, it was a ticking time bomb.I was still angry and hurt but I took her advice to heart and decided that I really didn't want to reopen what was already a very painful and emotion experience. I also realized that my motivation was about wanting to hurt someone for my hurting... and that I didn't want to be that kind of person.

Re: Venting Thread, or FML!

Posted: Sat Nov 16, 2013 10:24 pm
by Kareesh
Been at the hospital since 2:30 this afternoon...it's now 12:30 and I just got home. My sister-in-law called me asking if I could take her to the ER 'cause she was feeling crappy. So off we went. Took us forever to get in and forever for them to figure out what was going on. Turns out she has gall stones and they were blackening, meaning that they had to remove her gallbladder. Yet, before they could do that, they had to get the GI doctors (gastrointestinal) to talk to her. They won't do that until tomorrow morning. Yet, they have to do a scope-thingie to get the stones out before they can remove the gallbladder. Earliest they'll do that is Monday. She just got a room around midnight, and I took my leave, hoping and praying she'll get some rest. Her mom's here and her husband will be there after he gets off work (he's a manager at a resturaunt). On top of all that, she has a daughter 2 months older than mine, so I may be babysitting my niece this week.

And to think, I was suppose to be carving turkeys for my church's Thanksgiving Banquet for tomorrow.

It's been a long day....

Re: Venting Thread, or FML!

Posted: Sun Nov 17, 2013 4:32 am
by Ally
kuja.girl wrote:@Ally- It sounds like your vet did the right thing by 1)telling you what she suspected, 2) running tests, 3) giving you the results ... it may be that her bedside manner just sucks. There are good vets, bad vets and just "ok" vets. Instead of suing I would just consider changing vets. Lawsuits will reopen the wounds that have started to heal and will be even more emotional trauma. I have found that it's better to just move on... (my recent personal experience below in the spoiler).
Spoiler
I learned the hard way - never bring an exotic animal to a normal vet when you have a university vet hospital available with an exotic animal specialist. :/
I got a pet for the first time in years this summer, a really sweet little bird, only to lose him 4 weeks later right after his first vet visit. The coincidence seemed too much, but the University vet hospital (where he got more care) knew what they were doing and tried their best. It sucked. I had just opened my heart to this little guy and started training him when he was torn away from me. I was about to seek council with a lawyer over the whole thing but first I talked to the University vet - she told me there was no known correlation between the meds the 1st vet gave me and what killed my bird. The medications "may" have triggered his condition, but frankly if he had the disease they suspected, it was a ticking time bomb.I was still angry and hurt but I took her advice to heart and decided that I really didn't want to reopen what was already a very painful and emotion experience. I also realized that my motivation was about wanting to hurt someone for my hurting... and that I didn't want to be that kind of person.
Wasn't actually planning on suing anyone! My dog is fine, I just didn't particularly enjoy worrying about him so much.
Sorry about your bird though. I've always had a pet bird (though there are 10 right now...), usually budgies (I think you guys call them parakeets? Little colourful birds with a kinda lacy black stripe sort of pattern on their heads and wings) and I've never had one for more than a year (with the exception of one we have right now that's just hatched eggs) and it always breaks my heart to lose them. I know it's not the same but I know that birds are lovely companions and you do get rather attached quite quickly. If you don't mind my asking, what sort of bird was yours?

Re: Venting Thread, or FML!

Posted: Tue Nov 19, 2013 11:23 am
by kuja.girl
Ally wrote:Wasn't actually planning on suing anyone! My dog is fine, I just didn't particularly enjoy worrying about him so much.
Well, I went through the same kind of stress and I was serious about it so you never know! :)
Ally wrote:Sorry about your bird though. I've always had a pet bird (though there are 10 right now...), usually budgies (I think you guys call them parakeets? Little colourful birds with a kinda lacy black stripe sort of pattern on their heads and wings)
He was a cockatiel - and super cute. I'd post a photo but I think that'd be too much for me (and maybe for you guys too!).I'm planing on trying again after the new year with another bird. I'm debating now on if I want to get another 'tiel or go with a budgie/parakeet. Budgies are kind of dumb, but happy, and I could get more than one...
Also if yours are only living a year I would stop buying them from wherever you are getting them! They should live to at least 5 years! I hope your mommy does well with her eggs.

Re: Venting Thread, or FML!

Posted: Tue Nov 19, 2013 5:02 pm
by Ally
We've got three cockatiels. They're Australian natives as far as I know, though we call them weiros. They are lovely birds, one of ours dances like an utter tool though... Budgies I've always thought make good pets though you've summed it up perfectly; dumb but happy! Our mummy bird has done very well, she successfully hatched two babies before the father bird flew away randomly one day so unless we get another male I think her baby days are behind her!